Chicken pox virus, varicella zoster.
I have received varying reactions from friends and colleagues regarding this news,
ranging from laughter to surprise, to extreme sympathy.
In truth I was in great discomfort the first few days (achy, terrible sleep, extreme itching) to only moderate physical discomfort now. And a bit of shock when I look in the mirror. Now I am dealing with varying degrees of psychological discomfort and a case of bad attitude.
I find it ironic that I counsel people on how to get "unstuck" from unhealthy habits and ways of thinking. I teach meditation and I model a healthy mind-body lifestyle.
Until something like varicella kicks in.
Then I am pretty much back to the old ways of Ego and the self-inflicted suffering it produces.
I am remembering what it feels like to be stuck. To be either incapable or unwilling to raise my consciousness through spiritual means,
Because my Ego, or unhealthy part of myself
Wants to be fed with sadness, "Oh look what I am missing out on outside."
Worry, "Will I scar?"
Impatience, "I can't handle two weeks of this!"
Etc....
My Ego has been well fed with my tears and complaints, with many attempts to "fix" the problem by trying every remedy possible and eating well and resting.
And guess what?
None of it worked.
Feeding the Ego with self-absorbed thinking never works.
We stay stuck.
I am over it.
Time to listen to kirtan, reflect on the suffering of others that is much greater-
And pray for them.
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